1. If you were God for a day, what would you do?
Initial thought: very difficult question, as there are so very many options. After some pondering, however, I have broken it down to three changes which I would make, thereby revolutionizing the entire world for the better.
I would first ensure that I no longer be the major cause of division between human beings. Loving me would be more important to every person than the way in which they identified me, prayed to me, and proving to others the truth of and the actual source for that which I had said or written.
Second, greed would be abolished in the hearts of minds humankind, though not the desire for knowledge, security, possessions, etc... Rather, we would all want for these things, and continue working hard to obtain them, but the current need to provide them for ourselves in excess would be replaced, in equal strength, with the drive to ensure that others posses them in equal amounts. This would singlehandedly ensure the abolition of competition, of poverty, of illiteracy, and of ignorance. This is because every idea, notion, and insight conceived, learned, and realized by every individual would be immediately shared with another person or persons. And while there would remain, of course, inequalities between people in terms of intelligence and ability to learn, no one would suffer from a lack of information availability or from others willing to share that information with them. With every gift obtained, there would be a gift given, intellectually, financially, and spiritually. Kind of a worldwide "pay it forward" concept, though it would be inborn and automatic, a drive necessary to sustain life, like breathing (as I am God and can choose such a thing for my people) and not something one could refuse to do.
Finally, the ability to look however one wishes would be possibly, simply by choosing it mentally. Therefore, physical appearance would rapidly become completely irrelevant (though no less important) in terms of the people we would choose to love, respect, and to be valued in any way in our lives. The chick you're hot for likes the Brad Pitt type? *Poof*, you've got a button nose and pretty, pouty lips! Now she can focus on the personalities, morals, and values of each of the numerous Brad look-alikes who are courting her at any given time. To coin a colloquialism, it would completely level the playing field, and relationships would actually be based on something worthwhile, no doubt ensuring that marriages would start to last longer than the time it takes to pay off the wedding. Simply by allowing people to determine, with ease, exactly how they wish to look, there could possibly be enormous changes in family dynamics and longevity. So I have, as God, effectively solved most of the world's insurmountable problems by making three major changes! God, I'm good...
2. If you could be the parent of one famous person, who would you want it to be and why?
Perhaps someone like Brittney Spears or Lindsey Lohan, simply because I would revel in being able to instill into these young women some of the concepts which they are clearly lacking in understanding. I am not much older than these girls, and though not famous, was sadly raised with what seems to be a similar lacking in self-worth, values, and understanding what is truly important in life, or, at least, what should be important.
These are concepts that I have had to figure out on my own, the long and hard way, and as such, perhaps could help them to get there a little bit faster. And in Brittney's case, I know I would have gotten her treatment for her very obvious Bipolar Disorder so much earlier than her parents did. What is wrong with them? The poor girl had so obviously been suffering with something much more than alcohol addiction or an overindulgence in the club scene, and with no one helping her, she has now affected the lives of her two children as well. Where was her mom? Dad? Oh yes, probably too busy spending Brittany's money...
3. What was the last thing you regret buying?
The hundreds of dollars worth of parts for my car that has fundamental engine/transmission/etc... problems which are far too expensive for me to repair on a car of that age, so now the car sits in my carport and I am driving the new one I have had to acquire.
4. If you had a chance to bring one person back from the dead, who would it be and why?
Harry Chapin. He was incredible and died much too early with so many amazing things left undone. Not simply as a musician, although he has the ability to make me feel things through his music that few other musicians ever have, but as a humanitarian, a husband and parent, and an all around brilliant person.
5. What three things do you regret not learning to do?
1) Playing guitar well.
2) Training horses (quit an apprenticeship with a major Arabian breeding and showing "barn"-a Fortune 500 Company, actually-- that I had the rare opportunity to be picked for at age 17, because I was too much of an emotionally screwed up kid to handle what was required of me)
3) Sing --obviously, this is a talent that you either have or do not, and mostly, I do not. However, while my voice lacks overall range and color, I can carry a tune, and had I invested in lessons, I am fairly confident that at least I would have more fun when singing in the car, or going out Karyoke-ing, or maybe even in some cover band or something...Maybe someday...
6. If you had a crystal ball that could tell you the truth about any one thing you wished to know about yourself, life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?
Whether I will someday regret my choice not to have biological children, or at least, not to try harder to do so, since the overwhelming opinion is that I would not be physically able to become pregnant. This has actually been a relatively comfortable decision for me to make at this point, however, one cannot help but wonder whether I will someday feel as though I missed something.
7. What's worse... having expectations that are too high, or having no expectations at all?
Undoubtedly, expectations that are too high. "No expectations" is a concept that I strive to remember all the time. It makes disappointment impossible, and expectations are not the same as desires, goals, and dreams. All of those things are wonderful and necessary to living a fulfilled life. But absolute expectation of anything is bound to lead to disappointment.
8. How do you know when you're in love?
When the person you are with makes you feel better about yourself than you ever thought you could, when you want to make them feel better about themselves than they ever thought possible, and when you can see them for all of their beauty, flaws, and imperfections and know that you want them with you every day of your life. When it doesn't matter what you're doing, as long as it is being done together, and when that person can help you see the truth about yourself and the world in ways that you never imagined before.
9. What is the most important invention or innovation that has happened during your life-time?
Important in terms of humankind, probably the widespread utilization and availability of organ transplantation. In terms of my day to day life and convenience as far as I'm concerned, the cell phone, no doubt.
10. How would you spend your ideal day?
In the company of my husband and/or one of a very limited number of close friends with whom I am absolutely at ease and usually laughing. Anything else that is relaxing, pleasant, or exciting is just an added bonus. Rainy weather and fireplaces, cozy blankets, and stimulating conversation or a great, long-anticipated movie playing on the DVD is always a plus as well.
11. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
Everything or nothing, depending on who is doing the joking, what their intentions are, and, unfortunately, what time of the month it is.
12. What three adjectives might other people use to describe your personality?
Sarcastic, enthusiastic, real.
13. Who would you choose to be shipwrecked on a desert island with?
I'd rather not be shipwrecked at all, actually. In fact, being shipwrecked on a desert island is about my most terrifying phobia in the realm of one likely never to happen, as I don't foresee having enough money in the near or even distant future to take so much as a ferry ride, let along a ship of any kind anywhere.
14. What is your idea of a perfect romantic evening?
One where Sade and I are both relaxed, with no worries on our minds or overwhelming tasks hanging over our heads. We would take a nice long walk and talk, and then sit down to a dinner at a decent restaurant that we can afford, have a lot of laughs, talk about something interesting, before coming home to a nice, clean house, free of children, and make a fire. Then, we would have a few hours of x-rated sexcapades, wherein the Chihuahua would be able to find something to do other than either stare at us and whine or scratch at the bedroom door after being locked out. Ah, what a fantasy!
15. If you were to be remembered for one thing, what would you like it to be?
For being a great wife and friend to my husband, for being a good nurse, and for hopefully effecting some sort of positive change in the lives of the people with whom I have come into contact with over the course of my life.
16. If you were guaranteed honest responses to any three questions, whom would you question, and what would you ask them?
I would ask my father. And I would ask him first, how does it feel to know that you have a daughter out in the world whom you have not spoken to or even been able to know if she is alive or dead every day for the past twenty-two years? How was it possible to force yourself onto my body, to force yourself into my body, the body of a tiny, scared, child, and hurt me in the ways that you regularly did, and then go on about your day and look at yourself in the mirror, have relationships with women, run companies, and buy cars and pay bills and know that you were a incestuous pedophile? And finally, did you ever love me?
17. If you saw someone shoplifting, what would you do?
While I realize that I should, in some kind of collective humankind consciousness sort of a way, care, I don't think that I really would. While the idea of stealing anything, ever, from anyone, is not something I would entertain, and I know that shoplifting causes everyone to pay more for items and so forth, I still believe that the potential harm that could come to a person's life/future as a result of a shoplifting charge on their record would outweigh the potential benefit to the store or whomever. Now, I must digress a bit to say that if the person were a young teen, and they were stealing something of little necessity, like a lipstick or something of relatively small monetary value (thereby assuring hopefully a small charge if any to remain on their record, petty larceny or whatever), perhaps I would direct store security to encounter them in order to possibly (hopefully?) "scare them straight". If it were an elderly woman stealing cat food, the answer would be an resounding "NO", I would not intervene.
18. Is there anything you would willingly give your life for?
. Depending on the time in my life, the circumstances of my life, my age, and so forth, I would very possibly give my life if it meant that another, with more potential for bringing happiness or fulfillment to others, for personal accomplishment and success in some sort of philanthropic way, and with more important need to give were able to benefit from my death, perhaps I would. Let me explain...I'm maybe 60 years old. My husband/partner/best friend has passed. I have no children, even adult children, for whom I am responsible in any way. I have no relative importance in the lives of anyone I can at that time name or know of. I am retired from my job as a nurse and therefore am no longer bringing anything into even the lives of my patients. I have nothing left to do but either sit about and rot all alone watching television for another 30 or so years, or else endeavor to take on a whole bunch of selfish, personal-fulfillment-self-enjoyment-only-type hobbies (buy an RV and see the U.S.! Scrapbook! breed Bengal cats!, etc...) and a child, or a person of 25, perhaps a social worker, or a scientist who will maybe someday cure cancer, or a father of five children with a wife and a mortgage needed some essential organ of mine, that I couldn't live without but would allow them to carry on with the very important tasks of their lives, I would say, "Hell with it! Take my [inset organ of choice here] and be done with it!" I guess that isn't a very good answer to the question, but I think it does allow an important insight into the way in which I see life. It is only valuable when it is being put to good use. When a person chooses to be important to no one, or to do no good in their lives, other than maybe in terms of their own mind or annual income, or how many Hummers and houses on the coast they can procure, it is time to cash it all in, in my very humble opinion.
19. If you could re-live a day of your life again, which would it be and why?
The only thing I would really enjoy reliving at this point in my life, would be the feeling of walking into some room, perhaps a party or a club or some other place, any place, that I had frequented in the past, when I was very young, very thin, and really, a super "hottie" you might say, and relive that moment when all eyes were on me, and I knew that I was one of, if not the most attractive women in the room. Truly,though I'm not sure if I knew it at the time, I think I must have, because I do remember that at that time, looking the way that I did was one of the only joys, however shallow and disgustingly sad that may be, that I remember feeling or being aware of. I know that I am a better person than that now, that more important accomplishments have been made in my life than being the youngest, hottest thang around, but I also know that it sure was a lot of fun being 50lbs lighter, and ten years younger than I am now. With all the confusion about EVERYTHING in my life that I felt at 25 years old, all of the total lacking in true self-esteem, all of the eternal emptiness, depression, and shallowness that I felt during every one of my waking moments, I would never, ever want to give up all of the growth, development, and insights I have struggled to obtain for the past nine years to go back there for any length of time. But, if it was only for one day, for just a day, to relive that absolutely fickle and selfish joy of looking great and knowing it, even if that was about all that I WAS sure of, that would be pretty kick ass. I suppose though, with the work that I am embarking upon now, in terms of diet and exercise, in order to regain some of the physical attributes which I think that I actually HAD to give up in order to get to where I am now on the inside, hopefully, I will get to have that feeling again for more than a day, and with it I will get to keep all of the so very much more important and better stuff that I have on the inside now. They say you cannot go back again, and to that I usually say Hallelujah!, but maybe, in this respect, I can go forward and have it all...
Initial thought: very difficult question, as there are so very many options. After some pondering, however, I have broken it down to three changes which I would make, thereby revolutionizing the entire world for the better.
I would first ensure that I no longer be the major cause of division between human beings. Loving me would be more important to every person than the way in which they identified me, prayed to me, and proving to others the truth of and the actual source for that which I had said or written.
Second, greed would be abolished in the hearts of minds humankind, though not the desire for knowledge, security, possessions, etc... Rather, we would all want for these things, and continue working hard to obtain them, but the current need to provide them for ourselves in excess would be replaced, in equal strength, with the drive to ensure that others posses them in equal amounts. This would singlehandedly ensure the abolition of competition, of poverty, of illiteracy, and of ignorance. This is because every idea, notion, and insight conceived, learned, and realized by every individual would be immediately shared with another person or persons. And while there would remain, of course, inequalities between people in terms of intelligence and ability to learn, no one would suffer from a lack of information availability or from others willing to share that information with them. With every gift obtained, there would be a gift given, intellectually, financially, and spiritually. Kind of a worldwide "pay it forward" concept, though it would be inborn and automatic, a drive necessary to sustain life, like breathing (as I am God and can choose such a thing for my people) and not something one could refuse to do.
Finally, the ability to look however one wishes would be possibly, simply by choosing it mentally. Therefore, physical appearance would rapidly become completely irrelevant (though no less important) in terms of the people we would choose to love, respect, and to be valued in any way in our lives. The chick you're hot for likes the Brad Pitt type? *Poof*, you've got a button nose and pretty, pouty lips! Now she can focus on the personalities, morals, and values of each of the numerous Brad look-alikes who are courting her at any given time. To coin a colloquialism, it would completely level the playing field, and relationships would actually be based on something worthwhile, no doubt ensuring that marriages would start to last longer than the time it takes to pay off the wedding. Simply by allowing people to determine, with ease, exactly how they wish to look, there could possibly be enormous changes in family dynamics and longevity. So I have, as God, effectively solved most of the world's insurmountable problems by making three major changes! God, I'm good...
2. If you could be the parent of one famous person, who would you want it to be and why?
Perhaps someone like Brittney Spears or Lindsey Lohan, simply because I would revel in being able to instill into these young women some of the concepts which they are clearly lacking in understanding. I am not much older than these girls, and though not famous, was sadly raised with what seems to be a similar lacking in self-worth, values, and understanding what is truly important in life, or, at least, what should be important.
These are concepts that I have had to figure out on my own, the long and hard way, and as such, perhaps could help them to get there a little bit faster. And in Brittney's case, I know I would have gotten her treatment for her very obvious Bipolar Disorder so much earlier than her parents did. What is wrong with them? The poor girl had so obviously been suffering with something much more than alcohol addiction or an overindulgence in the club scene, and with no one helping her, she has now affected the lives of her two children as well. Where was her mom? Dad? Oh yes, probably too busy spending Brittany's money...
3. What was the last thing you regret buying?
The hundreds of dollars worth of parts for my car that has fundamental engine/transmission/etc... problems which are far too expensive for me to repair on a car of that age, so now the car sits in my carport and I am driving the new one I have had to acquire.
4. If you had a chance to bring one person back from the dead, who would it be and why?
Harry Chapin. He was incredible and died much too early with so many amazing things left undone. Not simply as a musician, although he has the ability to make me feel things through his music that few other musicians ever have, but as a humanitarian, a husband and parent, and an all around brilliant person.
5. What three things do you regret not learning to do?
1) Playing guitar well.
2) Training horses (quit an apprenticeship with a major Arabian breeding and showing "barn"-a Fortune 500 Company, actually-- that I had the rare opportunity to be picked for at age 17, because I was too much of an emotionally screwed up kid to handle what was required of me)
3) Sing --obviously, this is a talent that you either have or do not, and mostly, I do not. However, while my voice lacks overall range and color, I can carry a tune, and had I invested in lessons, I am fairly confident that at least I would have more fun when singing in the car, or going out Karyoke-ing, or maybe even in some cover band or something...Maybe someday...
6. If you had a crystal ball that could tell you the truth about any one thing you wished to know about yourself, life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?
Whether I will someday regret my choice not to have biological children, or at least, not to try harder to do so, since the overwhelming opinion is that I would not be physically able to become pregnant. This has actually been a relatively comfortable decision for me to make at this point, however, one cannot help but wonder whether I will someday feel as though I missed something.
7. What's worse... having expectations that are too high, or having no expectations at all?
Undoubtedly, expectations that are too high. "No expectations" is a concept that I strive to remember all the time. It makes disappointment impossible, and expectations are not the same as desires, goals, and dreams. All of those things are wonderful and necessary to living a fulfilled life. But absolute expectation of anything is bound to lead to disappointment.
8. How do you know when you're in love?
When the person you are with makes you feel better about yourself than you ever thought you could, when you want to make them feel better about themselves than they ever thought possible, and when you can see them for all of their beauty, flaws, and imperfections and know that you want them with you every day of your life. When it doesn't matter what you're doing, as long as it is being done together, and when that person can help you see the truth about yourself and the world in ways that you never imagined before.
9. What is the most important invention or innovation that has happened during your life-time?
Important in terms of humankind, probably the widespread utilization and availability of organ transplantation. In terms of my day to day life and convenience as far as I'm concerned, the cell phone, no doubt.
10. How would you spend your ideal day?
In the company of my husband and/or one of a very limited number of close friends with whom I am absolutely at ease and usually laughing. Anything else that is relaxing, pleasant, or exciting is just an added bonus. Rainy weather and fireplaces, cozy blankets, and stimulating conversation or a great, long-anticipated movie playing on the DVD is always a plus as well.
11. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
Everything or nothing, depending on who is doing the joking, what their intentions are, and, unfortunately, what time of the month it is.
12. What three adjectives might other people use to describe your personality?
Sarcastic, enthusiastic, real.
13. Who would you choose to be shipwrecked on a desert island with?
I'd rather not be shipwrecked at all, actually. In fact, being shipwrecked on a desert island is about my most terrifying phobia in the realm of one likely never to happen, as I don't foresee having enough money in the near or even distant future to take so much as a ferry ride, let along a ship of any kind anywhere.
14. What is your idea of a perfect romantic evening?
One where Sade and I are both relaxed, with no worries on our minds or overwhelming tasks hanging over our heads. We would take a nice long walk and talk, and then sit down to a dinner at a decent restaurant that we can afford, have a lot of laughs, talk about something interesting, before coming home to a nice, clean house, free of children, and make a fire. Then, we would have a few hours of x-rated sexcapades, wherein the Chihuahua would be able to find something to do other than either stare at us and whine or scratch at the bedroom door after being locked out. Ah, what a fantasy!
15. If you were to be remembered for one thing, what would you like it to be?
For being a great wife and friend to my husband, for being a good nurse, and for hopefully effecting some sort of positive change in the lives of the people with whom I have come into contact with over the course of my life.
16. If you were guaranteed honest responses to any three questions, whom would you question, and what would you ask them?
I would ask my father. And I would ask him first, how does it feel to know that you have a daughter out in the world whom you have not spoken to or even been able to know if she is alive or dead every day for the past twenty-two years? How was it possible to force yourself onto my body, to force yourself into my body, the body of a tiny, scared, child, and hurt me in the ways that you regularly did, and then go on about your day and look at yourself in the mirror, have relationships with women, run companies, and buy cars and pay bills and know that you were a incestuous pedophile? And finally, did you ever love me?
17. If you saw someone shoplifting, what would you do?
While I realize that I should, in some kind of collective humankind consciousness sort of a way, care, I don't think that I really would. While the idea of stealing anything, ever, from anyone, is not something I would entertain, and I know that shoplifting causes everyone to pay more for items and so forth, I still believe that the potential harm that could come to a person's life/future as a result of a shoplifting charge on their record would outweigh the potential benefit to the store or whomever. Now, I must digress a bit to say that if the person were a young teen, and they were stealing something of little necessity, like a lipstick or something of relatively small monetary value (thereby assuring hopefully a small charge if any to remain on their record, petty larceny or whatever), perhaps I would direct store security to encounter them in order to possibly (hopefully?) "scare them straight". If it were an elderly woman stealing cat food, the answer would be an resounding "NO", I would not intervene.
18. Is there anything you would willingly give your life for?
. Depending on the time in my life, the circumstances of my life, my age, and so forth, I would very possibly give my life if it meant that another, with more potential for bringing happiness or fulfillment to others, for personal accomplishment and success in some sort of philanthropic way, and with more important need to give were able to benefit from my death, perhaps I would. Let me explain...I'm maybe 60 years old. My husband/partner/best friend has passed. I have no children, even adult children, for whom I am responsible in any way. I have no relative importance in the lives of anyone I can at that time name or know of. I am retired from my job as a nurse and therefore am no longer bringing anything into even the lives of my patients. I have nothing left to do but either sit about and rot all alone watching television for another 30 or so years, or else endeavor to take on a whole bunch of selfish, personal-fulfillment-self-enjoyment-only-type hobbies (buy an RV and see the U.S.! Scrapbook! breed Bengal cats!, etc...) and a child, or a person of 25, perhaps a social worker, or a scientist who will maybe someday cure cancer, or a father of five children with a wife and a mortgage needed some essential organ of mine, that I couldn't live without but would allow them to carry on with the very important tasks of their lives, I would say, "Hell with it! Take my [inset organ of choice here] and be done with it!" I guess that isn't a very good answer to the question, but I think it does allow an important insight into the way in which I see life. It is only valuable when it is being put to good use. When a person chooses to be important to no one, or to do no good in their lives, other than maybe in terms of their own mind or annual income, or how many Hummers and houses on the coast they can procure, it is time to cash it all in, in my very humble opinion.
19. If you could re-live a day of your life again, which would it be and why?
The only thing I would really enjoy reliving at this point in my life, would be the feeling of walking into some room, perhaps a party or a club or some other place, any place, that I had frequented in the past, when I was very young, very thin, and really, a super "hottie" you might say, and relive that moment when all eyes were on me, and I knew that I was one of, if not the most attractive women in the room. Truly,though I'm not sure if I knew it at the time, I think I must have, because I do remember that at that time, looking the way that I did was one of the only joys, however shallow and disgustingly sad that may be, that I remember feeling or being aware of. I know that I am a better person than that now, that more important accomplishments have been made in my life than being the youngest, hottest thang around, but I also know that it sure was a lot of fun being 50lbs lighter, and ten years younger than I am now. With all the confusion about EVERYTHING in my life that I felt at 25 years old, all of the total lacking in true self-esteem, all of the eternal emptiness, depression, and shallowness that I felt during every one of my waking moments, I would never, ever want to give up all of the growth, development, and insights I have struggled to obtain for the past nine years to go back there for any length of time. But, if it was only for one day, for just a day, to relive that absolutely fickle and selfish joy of looking great and knowing it, even if that was about all that I WAS sure of, that would be pretty kick ass. I suppose though, with the work that I am embarking upon now, in terms of diet and exercise, in order to regain some of the physical attributes which I think that I actually HAD to give up in order to get to where I am now on the inside, hopefully, I will get to have that feeling again for more than a day, and with it I will get to keep all of the so very much more important and better stuff that I have on the inside now. They say you cannot go back again, and to that I usually say Hallelujah!, but maybe, in this respect, I can go forward and have it all...
